Life’s a joke and the joke is on you

berserkr12beyoncebeytwice
pansophlemyh

pansoph:

for chinese new year they get all these famous actors and comedians together and they do a lil show and one of the comedians was like “i was in a hotel in america once and there was a mouse in my room so i called reception except i forgot the english word for mouse so instead i said ‘you know tom and jerry? jerry is here’

2/8 16:30 lemyh — 269,134 notes
white--elephantsbbbalthazar
"All I wanted was to receive the love I gave."

- 10 word story (via suchvodka)

1/8 16:30 bbbalthazar — 385,087 notes
#same  #words  
moonemojiihighoffpermanentmarkers
#my life  
ohaymrdthdreamerssingingwishes
bewbinvoicesofreasons

bakrua:

bewbin:

Why do people drink alcohol it tastes disgusting

you don’t drink it for the taste. u drink shit like apple juice for the taste. you drink alcohol to get rid of the bad taste that every awful person in your life has left

31/7 00:48 voicesofreasons — 159,302 notes
sartorealityiwillmindfuckyou
jameskirkedjesse-and-his-candy-shop
clannyphantombeyoncebeytwice
clannyphantom:

LALALA I CANT HEAR YOU

clannyphantom:

LALALA I CANT HEAR YOU

gay8spencerrwatson

gay8:

riddle me this atheists: if god isn’t real then who is inside the kleenex box pushing up the next tissue